Regain Your Manhood.


Is she gaining the upper hand? What you can say to reclaim that YOU are the top dog in the relationship?  Also, things that make a man look weak.

Note:  The 4C’s: CONFIDENCE, Connect with Her, Caring, and Character, are the required characteristics that a man must have to win over any woman, for any reason (one night stand all the way to your forever girl, and everyone in between). Get a copy of my book:  Mastering Women.

Amazon cover. 12-16

  • A man of few words or being silent? Does work with other men, but doesn’t work with women. Instead. Acknowledge, 3rd C: “I see how you feel that way. Let me say this about that.” Either find a solution to the problem or validate how she is feeling.
  • If you can’t talk, say you can’t talk. Instead say: “I can’t discuss this right now. Can we pick up after I come home from work?” and then, keep your word and YOU bring it up. (Send yourself a text reminder.) 
  • Don’t just ‘hang out’. Instead: find ways to help, lift, solve, and teach. Why? It establishes your 1st C, CONFIDENCE.
  • Not being the disciplinarian to your kids. Never let your kids disrespect their mom. It benefits the kids by looking up to you and it benefits her by having her back. Again, CONFIDENCE factor is intact.
  • Letting others disrespect your woman in public. It means that YOU don’t respect her if you let this behavior continue. Never let this happen.
  • Road rage because he cut you off or she didn’t use her turn signal. Really? There really are more important things in life. If you find yourself constantly ready to blow someone’s head off on the road, it rarely is about the other driver. Do some self-examination. Find out what REALLY is bugging you. Most likely, it’s your boss or a difficult person in your life. Get that stuff handled! Having Road Rage is passive behavior. Being passive is for chicks. Take charge of what is weighing you down. It’s not some random driver that has you so hot.
  • Beer Belly. Have that 40 extra pounds around your middle? In addition to it not being a good look and it’s bad for your health, you want to look like you can step up if the situation calls for it. Strength = virility = sexy. Plus, how smart you will look when your clothes just hang well? Mmm, women notice. Women will swoon. Time to hit the gym.
  • I dunno. What do you want to eat? Being wishy-washy is NOT a good, manly look. Make a decision. Book the location. Take charge. You might be ready with a Plan B, just in case she already had Chinese for lunch. Other than that, you be in command. That is what women respect.

stressed man

  • Don’t depend on women for validation. Instead, unless stated otherwise, act as if you ALREADY HAVE the validation. This exudes CONFIDENCE. Waiting for validation means you are fearful that you won’t get sex. It really has nothing to do with the issue at hand. Focusing on the issue at hand will also avoid creating roadblocks to sex.
  • Stop being ANGRY. Being angry means you don’t have control over your emotions. Confident men figure things out. You research, you evaluate, and you execute…and you do so with purpose and by being a gentleman. You’re not 5 years old. What are you going to do next? Throw yourself on the floor and pout? Because that is what we think when you go to anger.
  • Exiting a relationship doesn’t mean you’re a failure. Many men let her end the relationship. They do this by cheating or having deplorable behavior so SHE will have to break up with you. This is clearly passive behavior. It means you can’t face hard issues. Learn to break up kindly, tell her why, and then get out. It is a skill you can use in personal relationships as well as in business. Anything less is beneath you.
  • Don’t keep all chick friends. Yes, women listen better. Yes, it is easier to be friends with women. That being said, men need men. Get your validation from other men. You may not want to hear what another man says, but it usually is good advice. Men will give it to you straight. Make it your business to always have at least one male friend you can really confide in.
  • Get dirty. Sure, you may like going to the latest foreign flick or to the opera. That being said, always remember to mix it up. For example, nothing says being a man like going into the wilderness and dealing with adversity or the unknown. Going on a camping trip to get in touch with your natural strength, independence, and manliness is just what the doctor ordered.

  • Quit acting like you’re a stud in bed. You’re not. This is one area where I DON’T recommend you act like you know more than you do. Read anything and everything you can on the subject. Interview current and past girlfriends. Interview random women. Men who get this subject handled even interview call girls for their take on technique. Women don’t chop off penises or poison their partner with men who are making her happy in bed. Don’t be that fool.
  • Don’t be a Nice Guy. A Nice Guy is a chump who can’t close the deal. When you are first dating a girl, focus on Attraction, not Affection. You have to present yourself that you DO want sex with her. You cannot voice this, as that is creepy, but your actions must state clearly that you are ready to consume her. You don’t have to act on the physical aspect just yet, but you do have to convey you want more to do with her than her brother.

  • Dancing. Many men ignore the power of dancing as they may not be good at it. My advice? Get good at it. It is a definite show of CONFIDENCE, control, and power. It absolutely translates into her wanting to have sex with you.
  • Wear a condom. Not wearing one means you don’t care about your future or your wallet. Don’t be stupid.
  • Go to the doctor and dentist regularly. Not doing so means you don’t care about life or what happens to you. Early detection, in many cases means the difference between life, the quality of life, or death. Quit being a baby and get this handled.
  • Quit listening to dream killers. They aren’t living your life. YOU are. Act as if you can and will succeed at your efforts and do everything possible to make that happen.
  • Stop being a deadbeat. Order a copy of your credit report. Get the line items cleaned up. If you don’t know how call the credit bureaus or even hire an attorney. A clean credit report gives you peace of mind and the best financing rates. No sense in throwing good money away. Take steps to get your credit over 700, then over 750, then over 800. You’ll finally sleep easier.

  • She holds the purse strings. Sure, it’s easy. She has a great job and is out-earning you. Most men would jump for joy with a situation like this…BUT, you lose RESPECT in her eyes. Instead: getting a degree or more training will often translate to more dollars. Also, that hobby of yours that you are good at needs a thorough evaluation. Maybe you’re on to something that will generate extra income or even lead to self-employment where you can better control your financial fate.

  • Hating your job is a form of complaining. If you can change the aspect that you don’t like, do it. If you can change departments or change to a different manager, do it. Otherwise, if the situation is hopeless, start job hunting. Life is too short to be miserable. What this means to her? You’re taking charge. CONFIDENCE. You’re a leader by making things happen.
  • Get financially sound. In most metropolitan cities, you know you need at least $75,000 to $100,000 a year just to live. This means you can pay all your bills, put money aside for emergencies, do a little investing, and have some money left over for the nice things in life, like fine dining and travel. Anything less means you don’t love yourself enough to be self-sufficient.

  • Have extra money. It’s not the money that women love, it is what the money represents = CONFIDENCE. It also means that YOU respect yourself enough to do something nice for yourself. I’m not saying to buy a car you can’t afford, as you should live below your means. What I am saying is there is nothing sexier than a guy who has a little extra money for the finer things in life. Maybe it’s buying that cigar or special bourbon, getting a massage, having a steam at the club, getting sporting event tickets, going to see your favorite band in concert, or getting to go to that ski resort you’ve had on your bucket list for a while.

Bottom line? It’s all about personal action.  Being passive is for chicks.  Taking charge results in getting more out of life, happiness, and yes, of course, more chicks.

 

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Top 11 Female Lies that your mom never knew that sabotage your relationships with Women.


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1. Women want a Nice Guy.
Fact: It IS true that most people want a “nice girl”. Because that is true, moms and other meddling women think that women should pick a guy because he is “Nice”, too. It doesn’t work that way. Women are biologically programmed, no matter what women say to the contrary, to want a man who has her back in the event of a threat or danger. If there is another 9/11, tsunami, earthquake, car crash, or we get attacked by aliens, women want to KNOW that the man they picked is ready to pull them out of danger. In general, men are (physically) bigger, better (able to assess and deal with the danger), faster, and stronger than women…which is why women subconsciously seek out this type of man.

Sure, it might be nice to have a guy go with her to the mall or carry her purse while she’s in the dressing room, but if there is a bomb blast, she is not going to want to stay with a man who’s going to cry or hide under the clothes rack.

The keyword here is “should”. Don’t look at what women “should” pick. Instead, look at whom they DO pick.

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2. Women want a man who has money, tats, and/or a motorcycle.
It’s not that women need these obvious markers. It’s more about what the markers REPRESENT. They represent that a guy has confidence, skill, can take risks, is edgy, and not afraid of being his own person. All of the just mentioned attributes come in handy when there is a threat/danger (see the previous section).

Disclaimer: Many women today, especially young women, do need obvious markers. The reason is they don’t have the skill or experience to determine what kind of guy he is (his character or his physical strength) without an obvious marker (money, power, fame, or a physical object, like a motorcycle, car, or house). The reason this is so is because many of these women grew up without a dominant father or father figure who typically could have taught them such things.

Stay clear of this type of woman. At the end of the day, you’re not going to want a woman who cannot discern a Good Guy from a bad guy. She doesn’t deserve you.

victoria secret models.  11-143. That above-average looking women are harder to get.

Car logic doesn’t apply to women.

FACT: A car that is well-maintained, both visually and mechanically, is worth more than a car that is neglected and beat up.

There are very few women in the world who wake up in the morning and are naturally beautiful. Let’s say maybe 100 in the world. The rest of the ‘drop-dead gorgeous’ women have to work at it. Such women start off as 7’s, to end up being a near-10. It takes a village of people and lots of maintenance to look that good. Eating well, getting restful sleep, low alcohol, working out, watching her diet, primping, prodding, plucking, tweezing, waxing, cutting, curling, dying, moisturizing, on and on. In order to get from a 7 to a 10 (an LA 10), she has to be obsessive about her looks.

Now you’re going to say…See? Just like a car, right? All that maintenance to be beautiful means that she should be harder to get as there is going to be more competition to get her, right?

No. You didn’t factor in these two very important points.

a. She’s obsessive, remember? That degree of obsession usually occurs because of low self-esteem. Notice the ladies who are “large and in charge”. The large women are the ones with the highest amount of self-esteem. They don’t care about their looks and they don’t care that you care about their looks (and hence, they aren’t obsessing). Because our pretty woman has low self-esteem, she is actually easier to get than those who rate below a 7. Message to you? Go after the most beautiful woman you can find. Your odds are not worse than the below 7’s, and heck, the odds are actually in your favor.

b. Most guys think that the most beautiful women are the hardest to get. If most guys are thinking that that means that no one is asking her out!

FACT: Some of the most beautiful women are sitting alone at home on a Friday night! Don’t make the assumption that they are always out or taken.

Since she has been sitting alone most of the time, she is actually more eager to get out of the house and go out with you.

4. It’s ok for her to take your number (hit on you first, ask you out first, arrange the first date, propose to you, etc.).
FACT: Men hate rejection. It’s really hard to be turned down. That being said, you keep your animal chops when you are the aggressor. Most men really like the hunt and the chase. It’s really the most fun part of dating, if you let it. It reconfirms that you have what it takes to ask her out. That builds your confidence…and we all know just how important confidence is to a woman. It’s everything!

Men who think it is ok for the woman to step up first usually do have confidence issues. It may work for a minute for her to approach you first, but at the end of the day (a few months later), she won’t respect you. Women who are put in this position often will manipulate you just because they can. I don’t think it’s okay with any man to be disrespected. It’s really not a cycle you want to get into. If you have trouble approaching women, let’s work on that. The sexes are not equal. Relationships work best when you make the first move. After you have established that you have confidence, in her eyes, you can then take turns leading the charge. Until then, all eyes are on you.

5. There’s nothing more important than having a girl that you can do things with, right?
You work hard. In your off-time, you really just want to relax and have fun. Many men choose women just because they have similar interests. While there is nothing wrong with that, you shouldn’t choose her only because of this trait. There are key things I teach men to look for that will enhance and solidify any relationship. If you are considering having her around for the long-haul, you also should be looking at whether your values and morals match up. Values and morals are set in stone by age 7. It’s not likely that you are going to change that part of her personality, nor are you going to be happy long term if she has traits that are at odds with your values and morals.

Does she respect you? That’s a big one, too. There are a couple more traits that I would like you to look at, too. Get the list of the three other traits in my book that need to be in your line up to evaluate whether or not you’re keeping her long term.

guy makes girl laugh.  11-146. Women want a man who makes them laugh.
Sure, most women will tell you they love a guy who makes them laugh. Who doesn’t want to laugh and have a good time? What they don’t tell you is just laughing is not enough to win her over. I once had a high school friend who is the funniest guy I’ve ever met. Every 10 years, we meet at the reunion. I am in stitches every time I see him. He even tried to date me after college. Not a chance. He is just not date-worthy. I can’t quite put my finger on it but let’s say it’s a confidence issue. He’s a helluva nice guy, maybe even too nice. I guess I get the feeling that he would be a push-over (meaning having no backbone) which is why I was not interested in dating him.

Some men use laughter as a cover-up to push down insecure feelings they have about themselves. It’s sort of like the guy who is 5’7” who would like to be taller. Whatever it is they don’t feel good about needs to be addressed on a personal growth level, rather than using laughter (or a fancy car, expensive dinner, or other perks) to conceal their insecurity.

It turns out that my high school friend was adopted. I suspect those unresolved feelings of feeling ‘less than’ come from that. Although his adoptive parents were very loving and supportive, he never did meet his birth parents and he feels a lot of angst over that.

teacup dog.  11-147. It’s cool that you walk their teacup dog.
Sometimes, a cigar is just a cigar, right? Walking her teacup dog is not just walking a teacup dog. Most grown men would never own a teacup dog. Walking her dog is an announcement, an announcement to the whole neighborhood, that YOU are walking her dog. Basically, much to her dismay, she can’t follow you around day and night to see what you’re up to and who you’re talking to. Your walking her teacup dog acts as a giant, moving billboard telling the neighborhood that you belong to her. While you’re walking the teacup dog, the dog serves as a deterrent from other women talking to you.

This same territorial logic also applies when your woman sends you to the market to get her tampons. She really just needs milk, but she is also going to have to get her some tampons. At checkout, other women know you are taken because you have a box on tampons in your basket.

Bottom line? Don’t walk teacup dogs or buy her tampons…ever! It’s an ingenuous way of controlling you.

8. There’s nothing wrong with long-distance relationships. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?
No. There comes a time when someone will have to move. Usually men don’t move because of their job and women don’t move because they don’t want to leave their friends and family.

Unless you live in a really small town in Idaho or Montana, I am not going to give you a hall pass on this issue. Studies have shown that people choose potential partners from really far away because, emotionally speaking, they just don’t really want to be in a relationship. The physical distance usually guarantees the emotional distance.

It’s ok if you aren’t ready to be in a relationship. It is selfish and unfair to ask the other person to get invested in you when you have little or no investment in her.

There are ways to find women in your own town. You just need a new skill set if the numbers seem against you. I teach how to be more effective with your search.

9. You should believe her when she talks about birth control.
It’s not that she’s trying to lie or deceive you. It’s more that it doesn’t matter what she says about birth control. The body wants what the body wants. Meaning that her hormones will eventually take over and she will catch feelings for you. When that happens, usually about the 3 month mark, she will conveniently “forget” to take the Pill or neglect using birth control. Unless she has a semi-permanent method, like an IUD, an implant, or shot, and you were there to confirm its administration, you really can’t trust what she says about birth control.

cheating on you.  11-1410. There’s nothing you can do to prevent her from cheating on you.
Yes, there is a proven way you can tell whether or not she will cheat on you. It’s very simple when you know what to look for. Details are in my book, MASTERING WOMEN. You can’t just ask her because people who are cheating or thinking about cheating will lie. It does NOT involve trailing her, putting a private detective on her, or breaking into her cell phone. 4 simple traits will give you the peace of mind you are looking for.

11. There’s no way to tell if she really loves you for you, right?

So many women today marry the idea rather than the person. Meaning they are more wrapped up in the event: the dress, the attention, the gifts, etc. than you. Today, it is less about the guy and more about how the event makes her feel (special). Many women have been dreaming about their special day since they were five years old. Disney movies further cement this notion by having the handsome Prince sweep them away. The movie usually has a problem that the Prince needs to overcome to win over the pretty damsel. That struggle makes the outcome even sweeter. That’s a lot of fairy tale dust that your average guy must live up to to win his girl with the same intensity.

So, is there any hope for you? Yes, there is. My 4 proven steps will insure that your day has come and she loves you for you, no matter how grand a wedding she is planning. Heck, she is so in love with you that she doesn’t even need a wedding! How do you like them apples?

As you can see, there are lots of lies and misconceptions about dating that women will have you believe. Get smart, don’t be duped, and be more effective with women. Find out more about these tips and others in my book MASTERING WOMEN.

MASTERING WOMEN book. New!


ebook cover, Tim.  Real Truth.  V3.5 re web sized.  11-5-14  Click here:  http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00B0594II/?tag=dt4m-20

Ms. Gross is a Men’s Advocate who champions men being men. She empowers men to
tap into their innate skills to win over women. Due to the fallout from Women’s
Lib some 35 years ago, we have a social climate that it’s somehow no longer okay
to be a man. She sets out to right this wrong.

Ms. Gross interviewed over 20,000 men to research her book, MASTERING WOMEN. After a generation of men who were raised by single and/or overbearing moms, many men today are at a great loss with how to interact with women, much less win them over. In gathering the research for her book, she found that many men are resorting
to:

a. Being cocky or arrogant
b. Being players
c. Being that guy waiting on the sidelines afraid to make a move and/or
d. Flat out resignation.

Ms. Gross asserts that you can be CONFIDENT and still remain
a gentleman…and she shows you how. She tells men how to be more effective with
women and helps them avoid doing the things that hold them back. Her tips are
straight to the point, easy to do, irreverent, funny, and entertaining. Her
advice offers much more than just Dating Tips. She shows how to lead a
fulfilled, passionate, and happy life that covers so much of the human
experience.

By liberating men, it is her conviction that not only men,
but women and children, will be elevated in this Men’s Movement. She believes
society as a whole will come to a collective understanding and stop all the game
playing that is so prevalent today.

Ms. Gross wrote this book out of curiosity and personal necessity. After a long marriage and re-entering the dating scene, she found that so many men had lost their way and were so homogenized (= womanized). She set out to find why this occurred and vowed to right this wrong.

Ms. Gross asserts that if you do the following simple 4 steps, you can win over any woman…either for a one-night stand or to win the woman of your dreams. The research leading to the 4 steps comes from how we operated as a species 10,000 years ago. Unlike popular belief, Ms. Gross asserts that not much has changed since Caveman days with regard to sex and mating as a lot of what we do is biologically and hormonally hard-wired. Ms. Gross takes these very complex processes and delivers them to you in a way that you can do TODAY. The result? You get the bottom line on how to get it done for real! No tricks, no gimmicks, no lying, no deceiving…you’re getting the real deal FROM A WOMAN. You will drop your fears and confusion about women and step into your Confidence and Power with the secrets of mating that Ms. Gross reveals.

——

LINDA GROSS, who goes by the penname ‘DT’, has a degree in Psychology
from UCLA, has been a co-host and guest on dozens of radio shows, had a weekly
cable TV show, was a top 10 blogger for years writing the popular column, Dating
Tips for Men, offers one-on-one consulting as well as seminars.