Review of 50 Shades of Grey.

Dakota Johnson is the sole reason to see this movie. dakota johnson. Dakota?  She is absolutely fantastic!  I hope they put her in every movie for the next 10 years.  She is a delightful combination of Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn.  She is innocent and seductive at the same time.  Quite an unusual combination for today’s young actresses.  She disperses unexpected amounts of feistiness to the role which captures our imagination.  Well done! — Reasons this movie didn’t make it…

  1. Jamie Dornan. He is kind of a drip.  I realize he is meant to be all business, but instead of being a drip, he should have been ‘ruthless’.  At least that would have been more engaging. jamie dornan

I hear that he wants to drop out of the sequels because his wife doesn’t approve of the kind of movie this is.  First off, why are you doing what your wife says when it comes to business?  Pussy.  Secondly, didn’t your wife know what kind of movie this is PRIOR to signing the contract?  This insecurity translates to the screen.  If the script calls for you to be a dominant man (both in business and in bed), you have to have that element in your personal life to tap into the role properly.

  1. The guy is supposed to be drop-dead gorgeous. Although his abs get perfect 10’s, his face is Not all that cute, in fact, in many camera angles, he is downright ugly.  If he is going to be an a*hole, at least make it a face that we are glued to.

If Dornan drops out, I vote for Ryan Serhant, of Bravo’s Million Dollar Listing to step in.  He is ruthless in business, has great abs, and is cute from all angles. Ryan Serhant

  1. I realize this movie is about being a sex slave. In general, most women are not into that.  I know the definition of ‘slave’ means you are subservient to your master’s requests.  For that, it is hard to watch a movie where the sex fetishes are only for him.  It is lop-sided and painful to watch.  You have to wonder what is in it for her?  Ok, so he acquiesced to take her out on a date once a week.  That’s huge.  I should call in a brass band.

Sure the movie is about being a sex slave, but you have to be mindful of who your audience is.  Your audience is female.  You have to give them something.  You either have to have her use her beguiling ways to turn some of the fetishes back on him (make him the slave, in a not-so-obvious way.  It cannot be an obvious way, as that is male energy.  It has to be in a non-direct (beguiling) way which is feminine energy.  I know, I know, this is a lost art, but hey, the author sold 100 million books.  Figure it out! katie kloss
(watch the rest of this vid:

Another way to give something to the female viewers (since we don’t get turned on the same way as men do) is to present something that turns her on.  When I was single, I had a phone relationship with someone who was a sexoholic.  He was very sharp to know that the sexes are different.  He would scour the internet to bring me something that might turn me on.  By bringing me something to get worked up on, I would be more willing to give him something he needed.  Since most fetishes are for men, I found that the things that turned me on were things that didn’t do a thing for the guy.  Yay!  The spotlight was on me…as it should be.

  1. Art direction/filming. I saw the same scene over and over again and I got bored.  Film it in a different way.  Focus on breast, pan down to the lowest point just prior to filming the vagina, then cut away.  C’mon, this happened at least 6 times in the same way.  Figure out other angles to film her naked.

The good about this shot is that I think Dakota will be solely responsible for making small breasts ‘in’.  Yay!  Someone needs to reverse the trend for fake boobs.  Her breasts are delicious. stepping into tub

  1. The ending pisses the viewer off. The woman behind me came this close to throwing her soda at the screen.  All of us felt the same way.  Have an abrupt ending?  Sure.  Have an ending where there are loose ends?  Sure.  Have an ending that teases the viewer?  Sure.  There are dozens of ways the movie could have ended.  I’m sure pissing them off isn’t one of them.  I don’t know how you expect the viewer to come back (for two more installments) if you tick them off.  It would be like going to a nice restaurant and knowing that the chef put a bodily fluid in your food.  I don’t care how good the meal was.  It’s not going to allure you to return.

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? See the movie because of Miss Johnson, replace Dornan, and make the script alluring to women and you will double your sales.  Of course, this movie already made 400 million dollars in 10 days (with a 40 million dollar budget).  The bean counters don’t make changes when the cash registers are ringing.  I really wanted to like this movie, but in its current state, it’s not working.

Stamina spills over to other areas.

Stamina (noun):  The ability to sustain prolonged physical or mental effort.
weight training.  8-13

Effort takes energy.  It takes conscious effort to move from place A to place B.  You make a decision to work out.  You have to set aside time in your day to do that.  The most effective way to do this is to pick a day and time that works best for you, and regularly go at that same time…that way you don’t have to “think” about it.

Pick a time that you have the most energy.  For most, it’s in the morning.  Your stomach is not too full from too much food, which weighs you down from lunch or dinner.  Most people are not starving in the morning.  If you try to go after work, you might be hungry.  That hunger may lead to your making excuses as to why you don’t want to go to the gym.  The other good thing about working out in the morning is that it sets your metabolism for the day.  Meaning, if you start off with a good habit, especially weight training, you continue to burn calories long after you have left the gym.

After you pick out your day and time, you have to get dressed.  Aside from your actual clothes, have your gym bag completely ready to go the night before.  Put your ipod/smart phone, headphones, sweat towel, gym pass, water bottle, and whatever else you will need.  The more prepared you are, the less you will make excuses in the morning as to why you can’t go.  If you need gas, get that handled the day before, too.  Ideally, you just want to get up, grab a quick snack, like Greek yogurt or an egg and maybe a little fruit, and GO!

How much time do you need?  3 hours.  If you have to leave the house at 8am, you will need to wake up at 5am, based on one hour of gym time.  This will include waking up, driving to and fro, showering, changing, getting a bite to eat, and checking your email or the daily news.

5am alarm clock.  8-13

Can’t wake up that early?  Well, I’m not gonna lie.  It is super hard if you are under 30.  To that end, maybe you have to go to the gym Saturday, Sunday, and one more day during the week.  That way you only have to wake up one day a week (before work).

If you are over 30, you can learn to wake up early.  Our bodies have circadian rhythms.  Our sleep goes in cycles.  If you can find the end of your cycle, you can wake up with ease.  If you wake in the middle of your cycle/full REM (rapid eye movement/dreaming) phase, you will be tired and cranky.  You just have to practice and learn what your cycle is.  Waking up at 6am might be an absolute terror for you.  Just keep playing with the alarm clock to find your cycle.  It might be 5:30am, it might be 5:15am, or it might be 4:45am.  You can try different times on the alarm clock by 10 to 15 minutes to find your ideal.

Now that you have made it to the gym, you have to work out.  This requires stamina, determination, and repetition.  After 28 days (in psychology, this is the time span necessary to form a habit), you forge a habit…a good habit.

28th day on calendar.  8-13

By continuing, you will see that if you have the stamina to continue working out, it will spill over to other areas of your life.  Anyone can quit.  That’s easy.  Your dedication pays off in more areas than just at the gym.  It will spill over to your work ethic.  When others quit, you will keep fine tuning and find ways to “win” at work.

Going to the gym pumps endorphins, the “feel-good” hormones into your system.  When you feel good, you act on those good feelings.  You will be more inclined to walk up to that pretty girl and start talking.  Stamina.  When you look good, you are more apt to walk with a stride in your step.  You have purpose, you have meaning, and you have CONFIDENCE.  Girls LOVE CONFIDENCE.  They need CONFIDENCE like they need air.

wanna go out.  8-13

So how long does this take?  Well, if you’re a total couch potato, about 3 months.  If you have been a ‘hit-or-miss’ gym type or have played sports, it could be in as little as 2 weeks.  The key to making this work, into turning fitness into a good habit is consistency.  Just go at the same time on the same days.  The other component, find something you like to do.  You may want to hire a personal trainer to kick start you into a fun and effective routine.

Fitness stamina builds pride, builds CONFIDENCE, makes you more effective at work (the physical actually clears your head to work more clearly), and boosts your CONFIDENCE with girls.

marines carrying tire.  8-13

I don’t know but I’ve been told.
Getting fit is very bold.
Sound off 1, 2.
Sound off 3, 4.
Sound off…1, 2, 3, 4!

Let’s go!

Comments? Questions?

Check out DT’s latest book, 8-28-13.  Caveman-Formula-FINAL THE CAVEMAN FORMULA, The Modern Manual for Winning with Women:

Gym + YOU = Girls

Going to the gym, and more specifically, pumping iron, solves a lot of problems that benefit men in many ways. Best of all, it positively affects your interaction with women.

1. Testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone that makes you get up off your lazy ass and go get some.

a. Pumping iron definitely pumps more testosterone in your system. The higher your testosterone level the greater the urge to get the job done.

b. Another way to amp up testosterone levels is to eat red meat. The best type of meat is very lean beef. My favorite cut is Eye of Round, and when I want to indulge, Filet Mignon. Here are some nutritional facts on meat cuts:

The worst type of meat source to eat is a hamburger, especially a fast-food hamburger.  If you are going to have a hamburger, make it yourself, use lean meat (10% fat or less), skip the bun and use a lettuce wrap, and avoid spices and sauces that are loaded with salt.  There are many no-salt seasonings on the shelf now that are great.  My favorite is Mrs. Dash.

2. Attitude. Inactivity leads to depression. Exercise dumps feel-good hormones, serotonin and endorphins, into your system. It’s our body’s natural high. If there is one thing you can change to affect your mood it’s to work out or engage in a sport.

If you feel good, you will be more apt to go over and talk to that girl.

3. Heart-Healthy. Men’s bodies were meant to be in movement.  In the Caveman days, we started out as hunters.  Men’s bodies were meant to run, lift, and execute precision and skill in getting their prey.  Today, we can go back to those same roots for maximum benefits. Running or any form of cardio is heart-healthy.  Not only is cardio good for your heart, it’s good for endurance (wink), and it’s good for vascularity.

In bodybuilding, vascularity is the condition of having many, highly visible, prominent superficial veins. The skin appears “thin” due to an extreme reduction of subcutaneous fat (usually below 10%) and low water retention (non-bloat), allowing for maximum muscle definition.

Healthy blood flow also makes your penis rock hard.  Drugs, alcohol, extra belly fat, and smoking all reduce healthy blood flow.  Abdominal fat blocks the testosterone that is normally available to you, which in turn affects sexual functioning.  Non-peak sexual performance is a huge wake-up call that your heart health suffering which could lead to clogged arteries, heart attack, stroke, or even death.

Go easy on the beer.  Limit your intake to a max of two beers a day, a couple of days a week.  Studies have shown that men who had three or more mixed drinks in less than a 2 hour period couldn’t get it up.  Over time, chronic use of alcohol can cause hormonal and brain chemical changes that stifle sexual functioning, not to mention all those extra calories head straight to your waistline.

Nothing is sexier than a guy who is hungry to have sex.  Chronic low-level stress like a difficult boss, looming deadlines, and too much debt can interfere with erections and sex drive.  Commit to spending 15 minutes a day to tackle and solve one problem to remove this source of anxiety.  After one stressor is removed, repeat with the next one until you have addressed them all.

4. Visual. Let’s face it.  Men are visual.  When you look in the mirror and you see results, you see some muscle definition, you see your waistline trimming down, you can’t help but feel good.  When YOU feel good, you are more apt to approach a woman.  When you LOOK good, women are drawn to you because they know you have put out some effort.  What woman doesn’t wanna fall for a guy whom she perceives as being able to protect her?  You big and strong brute, you!

Bottom line? When your mind (endorphins) and body (muscles) are in a good place, YOU are in a good place. That positive energy spills over to more easily approaching women and putting your best foot forward.

So, get up off that couch.  Put your running shoes on.  Go for a walk around the block.  Start with baby steps.  Do this for 30 minutes every day for a week.  Next week, hit the gym, 3x a week.  Start with 5 minutes of cardio, followed by 30 minutes of weights, followed by 10 minutes of cool down and stretching.  With the free days, do an activity you enjoy.  Pick-up basketball, body surfing, hiking, swimming, bicycling, or whatever.  Just get outta the house!

I guarantee in 6 weeks you will feel better about yourself. In 6 weeks, you will be talking to more girls.

It’s simple math. Gym + YOU = Girls. Do it.

Comments? Questions?

Check out DT’s latest book, 8-7-13.  Caveman-Formula-6 THE CAVEMAN FORMULA, The Modern Manual for Mastering Women:


ebook cover, Tim.  Real Truth.  V3.5 re web sized.  11-5-14  Click here:

Ms. Gross is a Men’s Advocate who champions men being men. She empowers men to
tap into their innate skills to win over women. Due to the fallout from Women’s
Lib some 35 years ago, we have a social climate that it’s somehow no longer okay
to be a man. She sets out to right this wrong.

Ms. Gross interviewed over 20,000 men to research her book, MASTERING WOMEN. After a generation of men who were raised by single and/or overbearing moms, many men today are at a great loss with how to interact with women, much less win them over. In gathering the research for her book, she found that many men are resorting

a. Being cocky or arrogant
b. Being players
c. Being that guy waiting on the sidelines afraid to make a move and/or
d. Flat out resignation.

Ms. Gross asserts that you can be CONFIDENT and still remain
a gentleman…and she shows you how. She tells men how to be more effective with
women and helps them avoid doing the things that hold them back. Her tips are
straight to the point, easy to do, irreverent, funny, and entertaining. Her
advice offers much more than just Dating Tips. She shows how to lead a
fulfilled, passionate, and happy life that covers so much of the human

By liberating men, it is her conviction that not only men,
but women and children, will be elevated in this Men’s Movement. She believes
society as a whole will come to a collective understanding and stop all the game
playing that is so prevalent today.

Ms. Gross wrote this book out of curiosity and personal necessity. After a long marriage and re-entering the dating scene, she found that so many men had lost their way and were so homogenized (= womanized). She set out to find why this occurred and vowed to right this wrong.

Ms. Gross asserts that if you do the following simple 4 steps, you can win over any woman…either for a one-night stand or to win the woman of your dreams. The research leading to the 4 steps comes from how we operated as a species 10,000 years ago. Unlike popular belief, Ms. Gross asserts that not much has changed since Caveman days with regard to sex and mating as a lot of what we do is biologically and hormonally hard-wired. Ms. Gross takes these very complex processes and delivers them to you in a way that you can do TODAY. The result? You get the bottom line on how to get it done for real! No tricks, no gimmicks, no lying, no deceiving…you’re getting the real deal FROM A WOMAN. You will drop your fears and confusion about women and step into your Confidence and Power with the secrets of mating that Ms. Gross reveals.


LINDA GROSS, who goes by the penname ‘DT’, has a degree in Psychology
from UCLA, has been a co-host and guest on dozens of radio shows, had a weekly
cable TV show, was a top 10 blogger for years writing the popular column, Dating
Tips for Men, offers one-on-one consulting as well as seminars.

He’s got style, he’s got swagger, he’s got game…so?

Meet our man of the hour…Scott Disick, Kourtney Kardashian’s baby daddy.  Wtf is wrong with him???

He is good looking, comes from well-to-do parents, is a business owner himself (he just opened a new restaurant in NYC), has no problem getting any girl he wants, has money, has two parents who are still married…what gives?

His damn baby mama, Kourtney Kardashian only has sex with him (once a year) to pop out another kid to play with her existing kid.

On her latest rant, she feels that Scott doesn’t do enough around the house…so, he must do some chores, like turning off the lights or turning on the alarm, to collect enough points, 10, to earn sex.


Here is the clip that didn’t make it to the show…see what you think.

This is definitely getting buzz with the ladies who think this is the best thing since sliced bread.  While it is true that most men are lazy when they are at home, heck it’s probably because they bust their tail all day at work so they can provide for her and the children.

From her end, she’s one of the biggest control freaks I can think of.  How she got all this status, I gotta tell you, my jaw drops in amazement.  For some woman to have that much control over a guy, girl, you gotta teach me YOUR tricks.  Wow.

I think she definitely is the least attractive of all the Kardashians.  Ya, she might jointly run their clothing store Dash, with her two other sisters, I think she has no discernible talent.  Every time I hear that droning voice I wanna stick the most expensive Bose noise-cancelling headphones I can buy to drown her out.  She works out and got back in shape after the baby.  So what?  Most Hollywood actresses have the same destiny if they wanna continue to stay in the spotlight.

What decade are we in that women have to withhold sex to get something in return?  She’s not needy or financially challenged.  Dump him and find someone else.  I guess her antics are so out-there that this drama is good for ratings.  What I fear is that lots of women observe her behavior and then condone it as their own.

What disgusts me is that Scott doesn’t need to do any chores.  They can well afford a live-in maid.  “Turn the lights out?”  Put the lights on a damn timer.  They are about $8 at the hardware store.  “Turn the alarm on?”  Most new alarm systems are digital.  Pull out the manual and figure out how to program the unit to go on and off at given times.

He’s not a shy, little dweeb that will never get a hot chick.  He’s Scott Disick.  He is the definition of A**hole, the kind that most women love and crave.  As for ‘what’s in it for him’?  I don’t know.  All I can think of is that he will forego his most beloved sex for fame.  Is the Kardashian train worth some sacrifices?  Sure.  About a year’s worth, I’d say.  He’s had his run.  He’s got his name in print…now leverage that and move on.  No Kardashian pussy is worth losing your manhood over…and that includes mom, Kris…ugh…that’s another blog (Olympic Gold Medal winner in the Decathalon, racking up an astounding 8,618 points, Bruce Jenner) for another day.  I’m choking on my Wheaties as I speak…

How 90 days affects a Man.

From my radio appearance on Reality Radio (click)my listener below hears me talk about the following subject…


Ce Katz The 90-day rule applied for me. No sex until 90 days.  It builds a better foundation and strength towards a committed relationship. And yes, doors SHOULD BE OPENED! Chivalry is dead!  Big dislike!


DT:  The 90-day rule?  Yes.  A very good plan.  Did you know that 90 days has significance in a man’s body

Back in the day (before the advent of the birth control pill in the 70’s), our dads and grandpas “courted” their women. 

If a woman hops into the sack too soon, it dumps a hormone, Oxytocin, that bonds this woman to this man (even IF he is no good for her).  We waste a lot of time and emotion on a guy who may not deserve that attention, not to mention it lowers our self-esteem to be with such a guy. 

Under usual circumstances, men’s bodies dump testosterone in their system.  Testosterone is the anti-hormone of Oxytocin.  Yikes!  Who invented that!  Anyway, when a man delays sex for 90 days, like in our dad’s day, the Oxytocin level, the bonding hormone, is finally at a saturation point that it outweighs the cancelling affect that Testosterone has.  In plain terms, it means that HIS Oxytocin level is at a significant level for him to bond to her.

How special is that?  I love Mother Nature.  It’s just so exciting to me to marvel how the human body works.

The trick today is that young girls don’t know how to keep a guy interested without resorting to sex.  It is a challenge, to be sure.  Sexual hormones are super strong for a reason…nature wants you to recreate!

One of my readers said she purposefully chooses dates that are long distance (she’s a church woman) because she hasn’t been able to keep her legs closed and the distance gives her a safety net to get to know him without the sex.  To that I say “horseshit”.  Practically every guy is gonna want in (and if he doesn’t, you probably will think he’s gay or not manly enough).  It’s not his fault he wants sex.  He is biologically wired to act that way.  Women are the gatekeepers.    Always have been, always will be.

If you can’t figure out how to be a woman without sex, that’s your own damn fault.  You deserve the heartaches that come your way until you figure this out.  There are 50-year old women who still haven’t ‘got’ it.  It’s your choice.  You can learn to be an alluring female…or not.

  • They used to tell girls to not shave their legs as any (white) girl would be embarrassed to have sex with stubbly legs or to wear grandma (non-sexy) underwear or ones that have a hole in it (again, the big time embarrassment factor deters sex).
  • Aside from that, after the first three dates (almost any girl can last 3 dates), keep the dates short, like an hour or less (to avoid temptation).
  • Schedule dates in the daytime (less risky when you’re awake and sober).
  • Schedule an activity.  It’s easier to keep your mind off sex if the date is NOT spontaneous and random.  No planning leads to our animal hormones kick in luring you to sex.
  • Schedule group dates, safety in numbers.
  • A giant plus for a woman is to Be Interesting even without sex.  That is the best catnip to get a man to really fall in love with you.  To do this means you have to start reading, being active, and having interests.  No…shopping or watching Jerry Springer doesn’t count.  When he actually wants to hang around you, you’re on the right track.He will respect that you are delaying sex.  Another bonus is that it tells him that you can delay gratification.  If you can do that with him, he will conclude that you will put off other men who approach you thereby keeping you faithful to him.  Your fidelity is super-important to a guy.
  • And for goodness sake, DON’T GO TO HIS APARTMENT until you Know you wanna have sex. 

Bottom line?  He wants to know what kind of person you are.  The woman sets the tone.  If you’re a long-haul girl, he will step up to the plate and be that long-haul guy.  That’s how it works.

If he cannot be a long-haul guy this minute due to school, career, or a life event, even the skankiest player will be a gentleman to say he can no longer date you as he is not in that mode right now.  He will bow out of your life and find more suitable prey.

The weak ones let hormones control and overtake her…often with unsatisfactory results.   The smart woman wins.  And, there’s nothing sexier than a confident woman.  Have a  day.